Hi guys! It’s been a while, no?
I feel like it’s been forever since my last post! I’ll admit it. I’ve fallen slightly off the radar recently.
I’m back with an explanation, but settle in kids! It’s going to be a long one. Feel free to wait for pictures of pretty dresses and check in at a later date…
As they say, finding a job is a full-time job. Right? Well, kind of. I’d be lying to you if I told you that the reason behind my conspicuous absence from this little webspace was due to the toils of moving across the country and spending oh-so-much time job hunting.
Maybe I’ll sound spoiled, or ungrateful, or bratty, but I’m just going to throw it out there: I really didn’t spend all that much time job-hunting. I did, however, spend a lot of time job-deciding. Maybe it’s a character flaw, or maybe it’s just dumb luck, but I truly feel that having a job is far more stressful than finding a job.
Now, let’s rewind here. Because I don’t literally mean going to work 9-5 is super stressful. It can be, but I’m not really a “bring your work home with you” kind of gal. I mean preparing for a new job. Or getting multiple offers and not knowing which direction to go. Having one, but not actually having one. To me, those things are really stressful. Like really stressful.
I wish people would just interview you right away, tell you whether or not they like you, and start you on Monday. The whole job-searching process of interview 1, interview 2, negotiation, offer, decision is absolutely agonizing. Multiply that times however many jobs you’ve applied for, and it’s exhausting.
I fully understand that I sound like a total nut job here.
How many people in this country are unemployed, and this girl is bitching about which job to take? Seriously, come on.
But, we’re all different people, and stress takes hold on our lives in different ways. We’re all friends here, so I’m just trying to me honest and open. I could lie and tell you that the excitement of moving far far away got to me and made me a horrible blogger. But, it didn’t.
I’ve spent the last couple of weeks agonizing over a couple of pretty simple decisions:
Do I want to make money or do something that makes me happy?
Is taking a supervisory role really what I want?
Do I like my car enough to spend a pretty decent amount of time commuting in it every day?
I’m sure some of you out there would be like, duh. Do what makes you happy. The end. Moving on.
But, I’m not like that. I don’t know why. It’s just not in my make up. I’m really practical, give terriffic advice, and don’t upset easily. I’m awesome under pressure, super efficient, and procrastinate like hell. I’ve never had trouble finding employment, and I sincerely hope I never will. However, career decisions make me turn to jelly inside. (Oh, and I can’t get dressed to save my life. But that’s another story for another day.)
I spend hours agonizing (whether consciously or not) over whether I’ve made the right decision, where that decision will put me in a few years, and what effect it will have on the rest of my life. It’s ridiculous, I know. I’m young, I have so much time to worry about big decisions later, and should just enjoy myself.
Logically, it makes sense. But, subconsciously I’m freaking out.
Constantly weighing my decisions is like a compulsion: no matter how much I want to stop I just can’t help it.
So, I’ve slacked off on blogging. Not because I’ve been too busy–because I haven’t. I’ve been gone because the thought of having to put forth the effort for anything other than thinking about my future employment has been too much of a hurdle to jump. It was so unattractive, in fact, that I haven’t blogged in a month even though I literally had nothing else to do. I mean, besides binge watching TV, of course.
That being said, I’ve made my decision, I start on Monday, and I’m trying not to freak out too much about the details (what will I wear?!). I’m feeling much better about things and hope to catch up on blogging all of my finished makes soon.
One final note, before I wish you all a happy weekend. (You thought I was done didn’t you? Sorry folks. Almost there. I just need some advice.)
I have a skin disorder called psoriasis. Thankfully, it’s generally very mild, and likes to hang out behind my ears along my hairline. It’s never been very noticeable before, and most people (including my best friend) had no idea I had it until I told them.
For those of you familiar with psoriasis, you probably get where I’m going here. For those of you unfamiliar, here’s a brief introduction: scaly red patches of skin that feel like a burn for a couple of days, then get really itchy and flaky. I’ll have an outbreak every couple of months, it will heal up after a few weeks, and then I’ll be good to go for a little while. Then it starts again.
As I said, I have mild psoriasis, and I’m so, so thankful for that. But, psoriasis responds to stress. My recent stresses have caused the largest outbreak I’ve ever had, and I currently have patches all over the right side of my face. Honestly, taking photos of myself is not something I really want to do at the moment. Vanity aside, I’m kind of afraid to put makeup on it for fear of irritating it further.
The doctor gave me some vitamin D cream to put on it, and I’m honestly not sure if it’s helping or not. The other option I have at this point is steriods. Which, to be honest, is not something I’m crazy about. I’m not a big fan of pharmaceuticals if not 100% necessary, and this is the first time I’ve ever treated it with anything I needed I prescription for.
So, why am I ranting again?
If you or someone you know has psorasis, or maybe you’re just a really awesome homeopathic know-it-all, what do you do? I’d love to know if you have any advice!
Thanks for listening, guys. I’ll be back with some actual projects soon, promise.